Thursday, February 03, 2005

Exhaling..

Since I last wrote, my book has arrived unblemished from the printer. Yes! It is a beautiful production, if I do say so myself, and now it's time to promote it.

Finding my birth family and the aftermath, which is what Fumbling Toward Divinity: The Adoption Scriptures is all about was an overwhelming, extraordinary, transformative experience that I could not have ever imagined. All my life, I wanted to look the woman who gave birth to me in the eye. Thankfully, I got that opportunity. I have a sister, also adopted, who has located her birth mother, but her birth mother has refused to allow her to see her. My sister is devastated. I'm angered. I share my story in the hopes that if only one birth mother who has previously disallowed her offspring to see her or know who she is reads my book and changes her mind, I will have achieved more than I could hope for.

To me, such a thing is a basic human right.

Is it always possible to get this information? Absolutely not. If a baby is found in a dumpster (or adopted from a legal (travesty of travesties) Safe Haven program) and raised by loving parents, that child will probably never know their biological roots.

I can't imagine what that must be like.

But when you know the information is out there and you still can't get it because the state claims its interest in protecting a person's privacy is more important than facilitating your healing, it can make you feel deep down inside like you're still the rejected child who's not worty of inner peace.

All the therapy in the world can't take the place of looking your birth mother in the eye.

1 comment:

Craig Hickman said...

Danyel,

Thanks for your encouragement. If you ever want to "get out of New York City," come stay at my farm and bed & breakfast in Maine. Not too too far and a great getaway. Check it out. hometown.aol.com/abcfarmbandb/